Daybreak | IC Inbox.
Aug. 29th, 2030 05:33 am
CLIFFORD NORMANUN: REDRIDINGHOODIE
STATUS: grade 11
ACCOLADES: n/a.
BIO: name's cliff. let me know if you'll buy cigarettes and shit for me, we can work something out.
CLIFFORD NORMANACCOLADES: n/a.
BIO: name's cliff. let me know if you'll buy cigarettes and shit for me, we can work something out.
It be like that sometimes...
Date: 2021-03-05 04:50 am (UTC)The little twirl Mili does makes Teto pause, observing them with a tilt of his head. Coco turns her smile on them and then, once they've done speaking, she rise, reaching over to pat their head and ruffle the hair between their horns.
"I love this family a lot too," She says.
It's a lot to think about, for Teto. He still hasn't worked out how he feels about it all. He'd wanted a family-- always-- but he'd never found one that he fit into and it's hard to tell how much he fits into the family of his older self. But there is Tía, and even beyond that, Imelda had told him, when they ran together, that they were going to be family someday. There's this room that they're decorating now, just for him.
"It'll be weird," He says before he can think to stop himself. "Being in a family."
Coco gives Teto an odd look but he's looking back, busy putting stars in his fake sky. Best not to point out what she knows of him, she thinks. Instead...
"At least you've got Cliff here now, while you figure things out," she said. "It helps to have a friend when you go through big or new things."
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Date: 2021-03-05 05:45 am (UTC)He's already giving Teto's calves a gentle squeeze in an attempt at reassurance or solidarity when Coco makes her comment. It makes him smile, something crooked and small, as he softly agrees, "Yeah." He knows that firsthand, thanks to her. It might not have fixed everything or made him happy, necessarily, at the time, but... She'd been there, and it had helped more than he could say without wanting to throw himself into a lake.
"If you need to ditch things for a bit and just hang out or talk, or whatever, just let me know. Pretty sure I'm going to feel out of place the entire trip, especially around the grown-ups."
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Date: 2021-03-06 02:59 am (UTC)The silent reassurance from Cliff really does compound it that his friend is here for him-- even if Cliff mostly came to see his crush. Of everyone, Cliff is the one he knows best without the tangle of the past involved. This whole trip might have been paralyzing otherwise.
Teto laughs and says, "Yeah. Okay. Thanks, güey."
He kind of wants to hug but... well, he's not sure how to go about it like this. Or how Cliff would take it. Probably better to not.
"Coco? Can I have more stars?"
She answers with a smile, getting up to pass Teto more. And to put one star on Cliff's cheek.
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Date: 2021-03-07 01:07 am (UTC)"De nada, man."
He almost pulls back, Coco's hand lifting to his face and her coming so close in the first place. He can stamp down on that urge, even smiling a little down at her, but unfortunately he can't stop the way his cheeks heat up. Now that star's definitely going to stick out...
"Hey! This isn't fair, I can't fight back."
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Date: 2021-03-08 12:22 am (UTC)"Mili already got me," Coco points out. It was a bit of a gamble, going ahead and doing that, but it pays off with that red flush to him. It makes her grin as she returns back to her sticker work. "Besides, no one said anything about playing fair."
Upon Cliff's shoulders, Teto giggles a little bit.
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Date: 2021-03-08 02:34 am (UTC)"Boy, I will drop you." The notion makes Mili's pupils thin, but studying the teenager has them concluding that it's an empty threat. Probably. They will just bite him, if it's not, they decide, and nod to themself.
And then...Cliff's got to thinking. "Hey. Coco. Looks to me like there's only one person left here without one of them little stars, and I've got a pretty good hold on him." How interesting!!! "That what it looks like to you, too?"
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Date: 2021-03-09 12:08 am (UTC)Coco gives Teto an appraising look and then says, "It does look like that. "
Teto's protest renews, drawn into a longer, "Noooo!"
"Mili? Care to climb up?" She offers the fae her shoulders.
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Date: 2021-03-09 02:06 am (UTC)"Being honest!" they chirp, hopping to their feet and scrambling into place on top of Coco with ease, "It should be me holding you up! I'm the strongest one here!"
Cliff has to raise an eyebrow at that, even as he's anchoring Teto into place and taking a step towards the other pair. "I'm pretty strong."
Mili's laugh does nothing for his pride. Oh well. They're busy getting steady and reaching out with wiggling fingers and a threatening star.
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Date: 2021-03-10 01:18 am (UTC)She waits until Mili gets the hint. Then, hup! Up they go! Cliff looks doubtful over Mili's proclamation of strength but she gives him a knowing smile and shakes her head at him. Mili's the strongest, it's true. But--
"The smaller ones go on the shoulders. Those are the rules of the game!" She says to Mili. She makes sure her grip is well and secure and brings them over to Teto who is leaning back as far as his balance will allow, laughing.
Help them both if Teto does fall back.no subject
Date: 2021-03-10 02:10 am (UTC)He's distracted enough by the squirming duo above. They really did look like twins... It went beyond their appearance and into how they were straining to make and avoid contact in turn, and how their faces were both lit up in delight. His grin is back as he reinforces his hold on Teto's legs, putting his mind at ease for his safety and hopefully doing the same for everyone else even as he leans forward to counter the other's lean.
Something he didn't anticipate, but realizes while Mili cackles from above and makes another reach: his face is now much closer to Coco's. By complete coincidence, it's red now, too!
"Uh, hey."
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Date: 2021-03-10 02:30 am (UTC)"Hey," She says back. The question is whether or not that would be okay for him. She's gonna have to think that one over.
Teto keeps up his protest, failing a little, but soon enough the star has landed. There it is, they're all starry. He stops flailing and reaches up to touch it like it's a treasured mark and he wasn't just protesting it a moment ago.
He looks back at Mili. The truth is, he was uneasy. He didn't know Mili. All he knew was that they were somehow behind everything, both the first time and now, that they were a fairy, powerful, and that for some reason, they'd chosen to look like him. They were a strange being in an already strange situation and it was difficult to know how to feel-- angry, grateful, sad. But, he looks at them now, the matching features and matching star. He manages a smile at them.
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Date: 2021-03-10 03:48 am (UTC)"Looks like we win?" He doesn't really want to straighten out, even if he's still wrestling his feelings, but even greater than his worries over kissing Coco is the reluctance to kiss her with her dad-brother on his shoulders. Cliff clears his throat awkwardly, stepping back and poking at Teto's legs. "Okay. I'm tapping out. We can come back to this later, or whatever."
But he'd like to go stand close to Coco and tip his head in a silent suggestion that they get out and do...something?? He'll feel embarrassed trying to hold her hand if they're just hanging around, but...maybe once they're walking. Maybe...hm. "Do you think it'd bug Pepita if we went and found her again?"
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Date: 2021-03-12 01:12 am (UTC)Mili's grito startles Teto too, leaving just a second before he grins and then echoes it with his hands in the air. Kiss for Coco denied yet again, but she doesn't look too put out, her smile still warm and fond.
"Looks like it," She says.
"Oh! Okay!" Teto says, preparing to climb down just as Coco lowers Mili back onto the bed too. "Later then." He hopes.
Coco laughs and shakes her head. "She definitely wouldn't mind. If she's not with Mamá, she's probably sunbathing on the gate."
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Date: 2021-03-12 02:41 am (UTC)The fairy's gaze lingers on the doorway a moment, brief anxiety coming and going at watching someone leave, like the door might slam shut behind them. It doesn't happen, and they slowly let out a breath. Of course it wasn't going to happen. Things were different now. Their family loved them...
They would have returned their focus to Teto regardless, but that thought provides ample reason to. This time, their smile is a little more awkward. Legs hanging off the side of the bed, they gently kick them to start an absent swaying, more to distract themself from the fact that smiling at all feels a little like a lie. Just a little, though.
"You don't have to spend time with me. It's okay if you don't want to... I don't really know why it's weird, but I know it is."
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Date: 2021-03-14 06:09 pm (UTC)"I'm almost certain she will be."
It's a strange thing, for Teto. He would understand an anxiety like that, but not from the perspective of being inside. That and, for the moment, his worries are mostly rooted in being too much for people, something that doesn't seem to be happening now, if Cliff's grin is any indication.
Now it's just him and the fairy who made him. The fairy who takes the sorts of things he would say and throws them back at him.
"O-oh." Could Mili read minds? Or his mind specifically? "No. I mean. It's not like that." But then, what is it like? He falters, his hands going to his arm to rub at it. "It's just, I don't know you that well. Except that you're the reason I'm here. And... I don't... not want to be here. That would be really scary. But..."
He takes a breath. It's something he learned for performances and kept up with. A slow breath in and then out. The crowds seemed smaller then.
"But I miss my friends. A lot. And everything's really different and confusing and I have to... this is supposed to be my family now. And you too. You even look like me. And you seem nice. But, um, even though I don't want to disappear and a lot of this stuff is really cool... it's... it's hard too." He sniffs, makes a face at himself, then wipes at his eyes. It doesn't help. "I don't want to make you feel bad. I just don't know if I belong here. And everything I wanted to do before, I have to do something else. I just wish there was something I knew here. That I didn't used to know and don't know now or that I have to feel weird about." His head ducks. "I'm sorry I'm not being good family. Or nice at all. It's not your fault. I was never really good at families."
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Date: 2021-03-14 10:18 pm (UTC)Holding his girlfriend's hand is infinitely easier than having a friend on his shoulder wrestling with some other kid and having his face in his girlfriend's face. It's still contact, but a lot less...and a nice little reward for himself for putting up with everything else, maybe. He has it gotten to hold her hand much, and never just to hold it. Now, at least, he feels like he's allowed to.
"...Sorry I'm being, like, weird."
Mili shrugs, more trying to convey a feeling of 'it's fine!' than telling him they don't have a clue. But yeah, they don't have a clue, or at least nothing more than he does. Everything was weird for them, too, they just...didn't let it bother them so much. It wasn't something happening to them, either. Teto's apology cut their own off, and they're left blinking a moment.
"That's not true! You're really good at families! You have a whole song about it!" The world es mi familia, he knows that even at this age, doesn't he? They chew at their lip, little fangs making imprints as they try to figure things out. "I'm bad at families. And human things. Even with all of Papá's help..."
They still can't really understand why it was all such a problem, this existential stuff.
"I don't think I can bring your friends unless it's okay with a lot more people. I wasn't supposed to do it again. I'm sorry I didn't know I would make you, this time." They're quick to sit straighter, hurrying on, "Not that I think it's a mistake! I'm really happy I get to see you. I just could've had help...making things better for you. Or -- I don't know."
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Date: 2021-03-15 02:22 am (UTC)"Weird is kind of my life," She points out. "But... I didn't think you were being weird." There's a pause, a moment she looks away, even as she keeps holding on. "You don't have to push things for me. I don't want you to be uncomfortable. And I know things aren't just easy for you. So, if that's what this is, please don't apologize."
That, she thinks, would be worse.
He laughs a little, despite himself.
"That's not the same," He says. "That's just... pretending. Hoping. It's not really how to be a part of a family." But he considers it as they chew on their lip, that he's not the only one fumbling along here.
He nods. Then smiles faintly.
"It's okay. I know it's... I mean, you did bring me here, but it's not really your fault. And--" Another slow breath. "--I don't want to take anyone else from their home either. I thought about it. With Imelda and stuff. But..." He shrugs, then he draws his knees up. "I know it's no good to do that. Avery's adult self wouldn't even want to. And I didn't even see Ricky and... well I guess he was Ricky too. It's hard, but there's not really anything to do except just get used to things." He looks to them, though he doesn't uncurl. "I guess that's why I'm kind of stuck. It's not your fault and there isn't anything to do. But I'm not used to it yet. So, um, that's why it's weird. I'm still learning to be good family. Like you. I hope you won't be too sad until I figure it out."
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Date: 2021-03-15 04:12 am (UTC)"No, it's not -- " What does he even...call all that... How does he sum up all his issues without making it a big deal or seeming stupid? "It's fine. I want to...do things."
Oh for the love of -- definitely blushing now, even if all that wasn't the only thing he meant. He wants to not feel like he's wearing two skins at once, and like he can mess around with his friends without something inside making a noise like a kettle. He should feel more welcome here, all the weirdness she knew her life to be, than if he were somewhere normal. And he does! It's just...
"It's a lot of everything, today. People. I don't want to not hang out with you because of that, though. I want to hang out with you, and this -- " Cliff lifts their joined hands, like she really needs the demonstration. " -- more than anything else."
Pretending. Hoping. Their shoulders fall a little in disappointment that their hair seems to reflect as well. Mili looks down to their feet, starting to weakly swing them again like it might help boost their mood.
"Jeez. It's embarrassing, I'm so much older, but you're the one making all these mature decisions. You shouldn't have to. You should be getting another chance at childhood, too." With a loud sigh, they spread their arms and fall back onto the bed, a few plastic stars clattering beneath them. They suck. They made him cry, and everything!
"I'm not sad about it, so much." Something inside tenses in protest. "Ow. I just! Don't like stuck things! Like being boxed up, but you don't even get to see the sides or nothing. It's not fun... So I guess I'm a little sad sad, but -- I'm a lot more sorry sad."
...Okay. That was more acceptable to their magic, it seems. It was hard to not be a little sad about it! The ache he feels for his friends and old life must feel like this ache in their heart now, loving him so much and being nobody at the same time.
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Date: 2021-03-15 05:56 am (UTC)"I suppose it is a lot. Especially after a flight," She says. "You want to just... be alone? Together?" Boy, that was a tall order in this house. "I guess I'm the one who should say sorry then. I didn't do a lot to make room for that."
She should've talked to Mili and Mamá and Papá too, her Tíos... She laughs sheepishly, he free hand lifting to tug at a braid.
"I think I'm a bit bad at this. But, um, thank you. For being cool with things anyway."
Teto's head tilts at them. He notes their kicking feet, the way they wear every feeling. He laughs just a little, then releases his knees to lay back too. The stars poke at his back, but it's fine. Hardly different than gravel.
"I had a childhood," He points out. (And has one, but what teen admits to that?) "But, I'm also the one who's mostly looking after me. I guess there's Señor R and Tía, but it still feels a bit like fosters you know? Or, maybe you don't, since you're a fairy." He laughs awkwardly. He turns from them to look at the stars on the half-finished ceiling.
"Being boxed up sounds pretty bad. But, I think I'm more used to, um, being stuck out of the box. You know what I mean? I'm used to... not fitting just right, even with my friends. Or my fosters and having to go somewhere else-- or running away on my own. I'm used to sleeping outside and writing songs about things I don't really know anything about. I don't fit now because I'm the wrong time and things like that. Part of me just wants to go-- anywhere. Not just stay in the doorway, not fitting. But also... everyone's nice... and so are you... I don't want to be thrown out of the box again."
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Date: 2021-03-15 06:44 am (UTC)"No, Coco, it's fine. I knew what I was walking into, coming here." He even knew not to expect to have time for them on Valentines, not that he's going to mention that and certainly not the why of it. Girl deserves that happy surprise unspoiled. "I told Teto we'll just go off and do our own thing if it's too much. If I really need to, I can get space."
Not much they could do about it, with his speed and experience in finding places he could be alone. Well, except Pepita. She might be a problem...but then, hopefully if she insisted on tracking him down, she'd let him pet her a bunch.
"Don't worry about it. I just need to wind down, that's all."
The way they stare at the ceiling, it's almost like they're searching for the constellations Teto offered to teach them. Being stuck outside the box, huh... That doesn't make any sense at all. They let their eyes close and let it go instead of contemplating it too long. All their optimism about opportunities doesn't spring forth, somehow.
Mili opens their eyes again, trying to pinpoint why. Instead, they murmur, "My other parents weren't anything like Mamá and Papá. Even when Mamá is mad about something, or Papá is too tired. I wonder if they were like fosters."
They don't know. Unless they can bury themself in Teto's memories, they're not sure they could ever properly compare the two experiences.
Then, "We can do puzzles together. See where pieces can go?"
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Date: 2021-03-15 07:02 am (UTC)At least that much is settled. She runs her thumb over the top of his hand.
"Good news, Pepita's very good for winding down."
And, with a push through that front door, a moment of squinting into the sunlight, it looks like she is indeed around, a grey tabby cat once more.
Parents like fosters huh? He knows about that. He met other foster kids-- hard not to, in the system. He met some who knew their parents but didn't want anything to do with them. Once or twice those parents tried to come around.
"Imelda loves and looked after her brothers," He says. "And... and I wouldn't want anyone to feel bad like that. Even if I was tired. So, I think... I hope they're better to you. I'm sorry your old Mamá and Papá weren't that good."
The change in topic is sudden, but, after thinking about it, he's not sure it really is a topic change. He turns a smile their way.
"That sounds good. I'd like that."
See where the pieces go...
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Date: 2021-03-15 01:22 pm (UTC)"Okay."
But! Anyway!! There's a cat! Half-reluctantly, he drops Coco's hand -- his nerves were probably going to make his sweaty and gross, anyway -- and moves to crouch next to Pepita. Cat, cat, cat.
"Hola, Pepita." He offers that hopefully-not-sweaty hand limply out for her to sniff, the way he's seen animals do even if he doesn't have much firsthand experience. Pretty girl. This house's girls were very pretty? In different ways, obviously. "Mind if I pet you?"
As much as they can while laying down, Mili shrugs. "I didn't know any better. Papá had to tell me. Now he's showing me, and Mamá, Coco, and my Tíos, too." They're much better, they think, even through all the confused feelings and the barely-squashed urge to assure Teto that it was probably their fault anyway. It felt strange to be too upset about it now, so long after they were gone.
Also strange, but much more welcome, is the fluttering warmth as they glance over and see his smile. They smile reflexively back. "So -- you said we don't really know each other. We should do that! Like why did you think you could drive a car? That's illegal, you know."
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Date: 2021-03-15 06:46 pm (UTC)He lets her go, but she stays where she is, feeling vaguely dazed. She touches the spot on her cheek.
Pepita observes this all with an air of detached amusement. She pads over to Cliff, then sits down right before him as he speaks to her. She takes a moment to clean a paw, then she moves forward the rest of the way, pressing her head against the leg of his pants and winding around.
He shrugs too. "Still. It's not fun to be told what you thought was good isn't either." Though his only frame of reference for that is a memory that only barely ghosts through his mind.
The next moment, he's sputtering a laugh. That had hurt and he felt pretty bad for what happened with his friend, Avery, but it's still kind of funny in retrospect.
"I didn't think it would be hard!" He protests. "Adults do it all the time and people do it on TV and stuff. I didn't know it would go backwards! Besides, I was trying to bring Avery home."
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Date: 2021-03-16 01:00 am (UTC)"You sure know how to pick a spot..." If ever there was proof he's an introvert, this is it. Time away from people, soaking up the sun with a cat... He's looking more rejuvenated already. Or like he might fall asleep here. Maybe both.
Mili props themself on an elbow, having to giggle at that reaction even if they couldn't see the memory itself as funny in retrospect like he can. "Even I can't drive. Adults do a lot of hard things, silly. That's why they're adults."
That's...not true at all, but anyway.
"I am glad Papá helped find you two, though! And you were okay, after... I was really worried about you guys! But I couldn't exact visit you myself, with everyone so mad at me."
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Date: 2021-03-16 01:32 am (UTC)"Yeah, probably," Teto agrees. Though his older self can't drive either. "But it was worth a shot."
He realizes now that they never would have found Avery's home. It really didn't exist anymore, just as Avery he knew doesn't really anymore. It's a sad thought, but it's just another thing to get used to.
"I'm sorry I worried you. And... that people were mad. They'd probably have been less mad if I wasn't, um, causing trouble. Heh."
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