Daybreak | IC Inbox.

[awooligan]

CLIFFORD NORMAN
UN: REDRIDINGHOODIE

STATUS: grade 11

ACCOLADES: n/a.

BIO: name's cliff. let me know if you'll buy cigarettes and shit for me, we can work something out.

© TESSISAMESS

Comments

[awooligan]

[He frowns, and the comment obviously bothers him, but it isn’t the same aggression curling into a snarl as there had been earlier in the day. Way too tired for that.]

Man... Fuck you. [With a sigh he falls back again, and absently curls up comfortably in the space available. Mm. Beds were so good. Must suck to be a bird and not sleep in a bed.] That isn’t what I mean... I just want to be normal. Even if my normal sucks.

[hawkwardness]

[He blinks once at that--hooray, another fuck you, lovely. Not going to get riled up about it this time, who cares. Sure. He's the worst and he's heard it all before.]

< You just want to go home, huh? >

[awooligan]

Yeah. [His voice is quieter, but has the honesty that comes from being inebriated and tired.] I want to go home.

[He doesn't want to worry about hurting people anymore because he can't control what he's doing. He nuzzles into the mattress and sighs, eyes drifting shut. He isn't planning on sleeping there or anything, it's just comfy.]

I don't want to do this anymore. It isn't fun. I just don't want to fight anyone... I don't know what else to do, because I'm not like you.

[hawkwardness]

[He doesn't mind. He's never slept in the bed. Wallow away. Another drawn out silence.]

< They might not make you fight. If you say you're not ready. They never forced me. You just have to tell them officially. I can't do it for you. >

[awooligan]

Uh? No, not...that.

[Facing the two Aspects he'd focused on had been weird, and terrifying, and he'd never been beat so badly before in his life, especially when trying to help someone...but it wasn't something he regretted at all. It had been the first thing that made him feel like there could be something worth being a werewolf, because at least he was able to protect his mom and Kevin, in a way. It isn't a fate of fighting monsters that he's afraid of.]

The school's okay. I mean this. [Cliff rolls onto his back so he can raise his arms and gesture, vague and wide, at...everything? Everything or nothing. The "this" he's taken offense with.] Ugh, I dunno. Everything hurts, and I thought it'd be easier, because I wouldn't freak out for no reason? But I'm talking way too much and you don't even get what I'm saying because I don't know what the fuck I'm saying. I shouldn't have bothered you with this, dude. What did I even want to say... I forget.

[Did he have a point......... Well, holding his arms up is tiring, everything is really tiring.]

I don't feel like me, I guess. I did this so I wouldn't feel like not me anymore, but I'm just doing something else I don't want to do.

[hawkwardness]

[Drunken rambling. He didn't miss it. But... Cliff is barely older than he is, shipped halfway across the world, facing the end of the world. Maybe Tobias is being too harsh in his thoughts.]

< How about thinking more about what you want to do? I mean, right now. Even if it's napping, I don't care. No one's ever used that bed. >

[awooligan]

[A nap... Like a pathetic child. Well, that's what he is, isn't he? Coming around crying to someone who couldn't be older than him, whining about how he was throwing tantrums and doing nothing to change himself. He closes his eyes again, just taking a moment to breathe and think. What does he want to do right now... Something he actually can do.

The silence stretches on, so it might seem like Cliff's taken the suggestion to go ahead and sleep until he breaks it.]

I want to eat candy. I should eat more candy.

[hawkwardness]

[He looks back down, peeking over the edge of the branch. It's not... nice, exactly to have the guy spend the night, but it's better than Coco dealing with this, right? And he'd be horribly selfish to not let a homesick teen use his empty bed.]

< I don't have any snacks, dude. But I know where the vending machine is. >

[awooligan]

[He's being much too patient with Cliff, especially since his eyes are still so unfocused even when he looks up at Tobias and they go bright with reflected light.]

I really want a burger. A raw steak. But I don't want to want a raw steak, I miss poptarts. Does a vending machine have poptarts?

[Despite his rambling, his speech is still slow, and pushing himself back into a sitting position seems difficult. Maybe because he's distracted looking around for the handler's glove, because that seems like a great idea.]

[hawkwardness]

[It's on his desk, because why not? He doesn't own enough for his room to be cluttered, there's no point in putting things away.]

< They've got candy? French brands. Probably no poptarts. Sugar's sugar, who cares. >

[awooligan]

[Ah, a nice easy place to spot. He stumbles a little as he stops in front of the desk and grabs it, then he's frowning as he puts it on.]

Yeah. I just miss poptarts. What candy do they even have in France...

[They have steak tartare. Last time he got a treat with Tobias, it was steak tartare... Man, he likes steak tartare. He wishes he didn't want it so badly right now, even with his brain dumbed down on idiot juice. It was supposed to keep the wolf sedated. Don't think about that, think about...being normal. He just wants to be normal.]

Okay. Where we headed to?

[hawkwardness]

< ...Chocolate? Don't ask me, I like soda better. >

[Or anything cold and sweet, a refreshing change from hot fresh meat. He gives the directions, fluttering to the glove once it's on.]

[awooligan]

[Can a bird drink soda... It's an interesting thought, and one he probably would have lingered more on if he were sober, but instead he rolls his eyes and gives a wry smile.]

Chocolate, huh. [Chocolate's bad for dogs. Maybe chocolate would keep it down better than bourbon.

He's not nearly as steady as he was the last time he did this, but the Clifford Express isn't too terrible of a ride. He falls quieter, though, weary but even moreso when he considers the possibility that all this talking and walking around might be undoing his efforts. What if he has to drink even more tonight... He almost wants to puke just thinking about it. Absorbed in that thought, it isn't until he's in front of the vending machine that he's like,] Oh. Money?

[It'd be weird for a vending machine to not need money, but it wasn't like the school needed it... Maybe he'll just squint and experimentally poke at some buttons with his available hand.]

[hawkwardness]

< You don't have any money? > [Grumble grumble. He doesn't get paid enough for this.] < Okay, hold on, I'll be back. >

[And he tries to launch himself into the air as gently as possible... flying indoors is trickier. He'll return! With spare change!]

[awooligan]

I wasn't really planning on our talk going in this direction? I thought you'd kick me out.

[It was going to be a short visit, why would he need money... He startles a little as Tobias takes off, reactions dulled but all that really does is place him back in the human range.]

W -- [Wait... But it's too late, huh. Off he goes... Cliff stands there stupidly, which he gets bored with so he switches to inspecting the snacks. Ooh, chips. That's not candy, but it's junk. Valid option. Conclusion reached, the boredom starts to set in again. Yeah... He can feel the antsy wolf's need for stimulation, and he can feel his nose, too, which he wrinkles and is pinching when Tobias returns. Cliff regards him blankly.]

Hey. [Hi...] Sorry. I'll pay you back. Y'know... Garrett would've just tried to stick his arm in and get stuck? Unless Micah was actually around. Then we'd've made him do it. Be funny. Can you eat chips?

[hawkwardness]

< Good point, I guess I could have crawled in. >

[As what, he doesn't say. He's got a little cloth baggie in his beak, which he tosses onto the floor once he's perched again. French change!]

< No, nothing in there, unless I change shape. Don't worry about it. >

[awooligan]

[Aaah, it's harder to crouch down and keep his arm level, but he's doing his best. French change... French change for chips to eat by himself, and that's fine. Since it would just be using more of Toby's money, he doesn't float the idea of soda out there. It's math, anyway.]

Do you just pick stuff up? Like a crow. Hey -- when I asked about buying stuff for me, you said you thought you'd have to pay? But, like... I didn't think you had money. Why would you?

[It's just idle chitchat because it doesn't really matter anymore. Chips... There's barbecue flavor, which is so ridiculously tempting but half-defeats the purpose of going for chips in the first place. Just regular chips are fine, too.]

I know that isn't the point, I figure you just hate this shit... It's helping right now, even if it's gonna suck tomorrow.

[hawkwardness]

< We all got Christmas money last year from someone anonymous. I haven't had much to spend it on, I have a lot left. >

[Rich people are bizarre, basically. Giving money to birds like that. He turns his head, questioningly...]

< Uh. What am I supposed to be hating now? >

[awooligan]

[Huh... That's bizarre behavior for rich people, he's pretty sure. Oh well.]

Uh, you think I just get wasted all the time. And that I'd be a jackass like earlier if I didn't. [Jokes on Tobias, he's just a jackass.] I really don't, you know... Shit's just...complin...complicated, right now.

[hawkwardness]

[He says a few words to himself, not projected so others can hear, and a ghostly hand picks up the bag of coins, brining it within reach of his beak. He could have stolen chips that way too, he supposes... blame him for not thinking clearly.]

< It's like a dollar in American money, forget it. It wasn't about the money, it's... also complicated. >

[awooligan]

[Though he's mildly distracted, he nods, having figured something like that. The way he'd received Cliff in his room sort of confirmed his suspicions. Since he didn't seem to be simmering on it -- at least as far as he's able to tell right now, which isn't a guarantee at all -- Cliff thinks it's...okay. Not great, obviously, but Tobias had sort of accepted his state without a need for explanation. This means he's not going to push on how the heck a bird ends up having a problem with drunkards -- idiots outside bars throwing rocks, maybe? He could see that. People suck.

And he'll just be assuming that Toby is a good boy and not a fan of random snack stealing for drunk idiot boys. It's all fine.]

Life should cut that out. The "being complicated" thing. Anyway, the paying you back isn't really about the money either, but more, like, you didn't fucking ask for any of this. It's like I'm making you my chaperone every time we hang out. You seriously act way older than you sound, dude, it's a little weird.

[hawkwardness]

[Cliff's not wrong and Tobias is very, very aware. But... what is there to say about it? Should he be apologizing?]

< Yeah, I know. Sorry. I'm not much fun. Fun's not what people expect of me, really. >

[It never was and it never will be.]

[awooligan]

[Apparently apologizing is weird, too, because after getting and opening his bag of chips with the help of his teeth, Clifford looks at him and makes a face. Anyway... Fuck, how is he going to eat... Hm.]

Kev does. [Frowns...at chips... It's clearly an unsolvable problem.] What do people expect, anyway? From a talking bird. Dead rats?

[hawkwardness]

[Inwardly he rolls his eyes and flutters to the top of the vending machine. There, both hands free.]

< He's actually into playing games though. > [And... you know what, he's not going to dignify that with an answer.] < I mean, you could play too. >

[awooligan]

[oh -- ]

Uh, was I saying that out loud? [The impossible chips-eating problem stuff...] Sorry.

[He holds the bag in his teeth again so he can take the glove off and set it on top of his head for the time being. He's recovered enough that eating with it on, even if he holds the bag in that hand, sounds gross.

Also, what? He was genuinely asking!!!]

Mm... I do. [Munch, crunch. Chips were a good decision, he concludes with a little nod to himself.] The consoles are back home, though. So it's mostly stuff I can play on my phone to pass the time. Not a lot of multiplayer, unless it's something I play with Kevin.